The little setbacks

Tuesday ended up being a rest day for me. My day started pretty much as any other day. It took me a few minutes to get the energy to get out of bed. (I don’t just pop up out of bed chipper and refreshed anymore). I made the usual deals with myself… Just get up and go potty. Ok, now just brush your teeth. Now brush your hair… I have to say that most mornings have gotten easier and I am able to spend a couple minutes curling my crazy hair so that I don’t have to wear a braid every day. But I have yet to have a morning that I actually felt like getting out of bed.

I took my medicine at 6:00 or so. The pills are easy to take, but the testosterone is sort of a pain. It is like a little gummy green thing a bit smaller than a Starburst candy. It has to dissolve between my cheek and gum, which takes longer than you would think. I bite it into 4 pieces to make the process go a little faster. I can’t brush my teeth or eat for an hour after so I eat my oatmeal on my drive in and brush my teeth when I get to work.

I had the usual crappy commute into work. I work in Lee’s Summit, Missouri, which is quite a hike from Baldwin City, Kansas. The real issue is the everlasting construction, horrible traffic and ridiculously incompetent drivers I have to avoid on my trek in.

I got to work and did my usual routine of checking all my emails and preparing for a day of meetings and drawing process flows in Visio… when about 10:00 I noticed I was sweating. And not just a little. A lot. I had sweat rolling down my back and making my shirt damp at the small of my back. I asked Jonathan, my cube neighbor, if it was hot in the office. He said no, and that he usually thinks it is warm in here but today it felt OK. I always think it is cold, so there had to be something wrong for me to think it is hot. I wear a hoodie and gloves at my desk most days.

I sat down in my chair that I had pushed into the corner of my cube, as I have begun trying out a standing workstation last week. My normal resting heart rate is 62, and I was counting 88 now. Jonathan suggested going outside and I agreed standing in the cool air might help. We went outside and I felt better. We came back inside, and a few minutes later I was sweating again. I decided to spend the rest of the day sitting down.

I didn’t notice anything else strange for the rest of the day. I went out for a quick lunch and was fine. I stopped for a Starbucks on the way back to the office and just did not want it. It tasted gross to me, when I usually really like an iced latte in the afternoon as a pick-me-up. I pitched the drink and bought a Coke Zero from the vending machine instead.

I took my second dose of medicine on my way home and started listening to a new audio book called Before He Finds Her. I started listening to audio books as a way to make my commute a little less stressful. Rather than listen to music that will pump me up, I found it is better for me to chill out and listen to a book. It helps me turn off my “give-a-shitter,” so to speak. (I learned that term from a guy I worked with at Collective Brands… Apparently, many of the techs that worked for him had broken give-a-shitters. Ha!

When I got home, I decided to take it easy. Steven brought me some Chipotle for dinner and I just relaxed and watched most of Mad Max before I conked out.

I heard back from my doctor in the evening. He said that I should be concerned about a heart rate over 100 and a temperature over 99. My sweating was normal… Whew! One of my friends on Facebook, Haley, also reported she had similar symptoms when upping her dose of medicine. I cannot tell you how reassuring social media can be. It helps when friends on Twitter or Facebook tell me that they have had the same experiences. It makes me not feel so alone. Really, I have tried not to let on how hard things are for me now. No one wants to hear about how sick someone is. It makes people feel pity, or worse yet, annoyed. So I really appreciate kind words or even an “I’ve been there!”

I am hoping to be back at it tomorrow for a bike ride!

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